Today’s post is a guest post by my husband, Ben. He is sharing with us today about the different options in schooling (public, private, home) and his experiences with each. Here he is!
I’ve had the unique privilege of participating in all three major types of US primary schooling. At various points in my education, I attended private and public schools, as well as being homeschooled. Depending on the region, city, county, school district you live in, and income level of your family, your options and experience are going to be drastically different than mine; hopefully my story can at least open questions in your mind to help you choose the right path for your children.
The most important piece of advice I can give you is to evaluate every child separately. Each child is going to have their own learning process and based on their particular needs, they may require different teaching styles. Some children are analytical and learn by reading the material. Some are creative and are especially drawn to the arts. Some are hands-on and learn best by being in a “lab” environment. No matter what your child’s specific needs are, you can foster an educational experience that will help them reach their full potential.
Public Schools
Depending on your area, you could have excellent public school choices, or terrible ones. Unfortunately since public schools are funded via tax dollars, if you live in a more upscale neighborhood, you are much more likely to have better schools available. The area where Kate and I live has some of the best primary schools in the state (and some of the worst…). Hopefully you have quality options in your area.
No matter what the quality of the school is, you should consider the pros and cons depending on your child’s aptitude. For example, I was gifted in math and science; not surprisingly I am now a computer engineer. The public schools in my area were grossly under-equipped to handle any child outside of the “normal” range; exceptional or under par. The teacher needed to spend all of her time teaching to the 80% of the kids in the middle, while ignoring the child below and above normal. I spent most of my days reading at my desk since I finished before most of my classmates.
Public schools can especially have a lot of benefits for children who are gifted in sports. My best friend worked very hard in high school and got a full ride basketball scholarship to a local university, even though he wasn’t the best student. At the end of the day, if your child can get a free quality education because they excel at sports, they will have done well for themselves.
Private Schools
Arguably, private schools are almost always going to provide a better education experience than public schools. It’s simple math. If there is more money to pay for better teachers, books, and equipment; odds are the students are going to absorb the material better. That’s not to say that any private school will beat any public school bar none; the biggest factor is going to be the child’s desire to learn. In my case, I couldn’t get enough out of school. My two biggest pursuits outside of school were reading (mostly biographies, business, science, history) and tinkering with my computer (programming and repairing it).
Different private schools will focus on unique key areas of study. For example, there is a science academy near us that focuses on teaching children math and science disciplines. They still teach all the basic required for graduation, but put a focus on those two subjects. Others might focus on creative arts (we have arts schools locally too), or technical schools that focus on engineering and technology. If you live in an area that has these types of opportunities, and you can afford it, this might be a good option for your child.
Homeschooling
The bulk of my primary schooling, I was taught at home by my mother, who had a teaching degree. While a teaching degree is certainly not required, it does help. The biggest benefit of homeschooling is that you can completely tailor the subject matter to your child’s interest and skills. If your sixth grader is at a fourth grade level in English, but an eighth grade level in Math, you can accommodate that. While is takes a lot of work to home school, I highly recommend it, because it can allow you to provide the best education for your child. How can I say that without reservation? Out of all the people in the world, who do you think cares most about your child? The government? Friends? Neighbors? The local school teacher? Or you and your spouse? You are going to go far beyond what anyone else can, because not only can you focus on just your child, instead of 30 children at once, you care more about them that anyone else will.
Unschooling
With our kids, Kate and I have decided to Unschool them. Unschooling is similar to homeschooling, in that both are parent driven at home, but differs in one key degree; unschooling is completely unstructured. Instead of having defined subject matter in textbooks, in unschooling you simply present real world material for your child to absorb if they are interested. For example, you take your child to the grocery store. You can explain how to count the cost of food, multiply that cost by the number of units you are purchasing, how to subtract coupons, or any number of mathematical principles. In my case, I was effectively unschooled in terms of computers. My parents provided me with my own at a very young age (12), books on programming and electronics, and helped me foster relationships with several older men who were electrical and computer engineers. While my primary education was important (in terms of knowing how to communicate through the written word, calculate and analyze numbers, etc…), in terms of my current job, nearly all the skills that I have were things I taught myself. Unschooling allows your child to focus on their passion (and any passion can become a career), instead of mind numbing repetition like, add together these 100 pairs of numbers so that you understand how to perform addition.
(Note from Kate: That unschooling is always completely ‘unstructured’ is a myth. You follow the child’s interests as the structure. If they want to do workbooks or flashcards, then you do it. But you don’t force these things on them if they do not learn well that way. Unschooling is really about following the child’s interests and learning styles more than adhering strictly to any philosophy or curriculum. Most homeschooling families probably do it to some extent, because they do tailor the experiences to their children’s needs.)
Our culture puts such a huge amount of pressure on children to be good at taking tests and doing well in school. Is that really what is important though? For example, I couldn’t repair a car to save my life. If your child tinkers with cars his whole life, attends a trade school to learn car repair after high school, and ends up to owning and operating run his own garage, is he a failure? According to The Millionaire Next Door, 90% of millionaires are first generation rich. That means that they didn’t inherit any money, but instead earned it all themselves. Furthermore, the vast majority of those millionaires gained wealth by having their own business, NOT by having a high earning degree like an MD or a law degree. Don’t pressure your child to get a degree just because it pays well. Studies have shown that men and women in careers that they are truly passionate about will nearly always earn more over their lifetimes, then people who have high paying jobs, but hate them. After all, do you think a lawyer would effectively argue his client’s case, and in turn earn his fee, if he hated his job? His lackluster attitude about his work will probably lead to losing a lot of cases, even if he is a smart individual. Whatever schooling choice you make for your child, the most important thing is that it is right for your child.
Thanks Ben!
How do you school? What do you like and dislike about it?
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TESTING!
I love that you broke down the options so clearly! There is so much to consider in educating our children and doing it well! As a current public school teacher and former private school teacher, I would love to add to both of those.
Most private schools have almost no resources for students who are below grade level because they are not created for that purpose. A public school has the funding and resources to provide a good education for that child. Many, many, many private schools "look" better (testing, students going to college, etc.) because they have students who come to school with fewer home problems and parents who clearly pour into their child's education. It is not all because the teaching is better, but the students arrive more prepared. Many private schools do not have licensed teachers or even teachers with a degree in education – because they are not under state mandates as public schools are, they can hire anyone. I believe this can be both good and bad – but something to consider when you put your child in private school.
In the public school I teach in currently, my classroom has a variety of abilities – my job is NOT to teach to a group, but to serve each student well. We have special ed resources as well as gifted and talented resources so students all along the spectrum are given what they need. Honestly, I believe I am a better teacher in the public schools rather than private schools because I am guided by standards, and I have to learn to reach each student, rather than a group of similar students. No schooling set up is perfect, and I believe in each season it can change for families and specific children.
I love your blog!
I use a set curriculum (use parts of it), but I also incorporate a lot of topics my children are interested in at the time, so I don't really label it lol.
I get pressure from outsiders who like to compare their children with my children or insinuate that they need to be at a certain level, like public school condones.
My main concern is that my children learn godly wisdom and not just knowledge from this world. Yes, they need to know the three R's, and be educated in many areas, but they could have all the book knowledge in the world and yet lack wisdom.
I was also in public schools, private Christian school, and "homeschooled", (schooled myself), as a child. I have chosen none of those options for my children. For us it is more about a relationship in learning and equipping them for their goal in life.
I attended private school through 7th grade and then attended public school. I remember loving the greater choice of classes offered in the public school and the hands-lab activities. However, I honestly was not challenged in public school until my 11th grade year. This means I spent about 3 years not learning much because I had already learned much of it in private school.
I have homeschooled my children from K-8th grade. In highschool my two oldest are now attending an on-line public high school. I've been pleased with the on-line school as it is challenging and they offer a great number of Advanced Placement courses. Of course, we do deal with curriculum that is presented from a secular viewpoint. However, we just use it as an opportunity for discussion. We have coming up a very athletic son. He needs the sports the public school offers. Next year he will be in 7th grade and the school is going to allow him to enroll in one class and then be eligible to play sports. I will homeschool him for the rest of his classes.
We also have had some experience in public school. Three of our children were adopted from foster care. While still in foster care two of the boys were in public school because our worker was not favorable towards homeschooling. We had a positive experience in public school, but I'm selfish and want to spend the time with my children. We brought the boys home after their adoption. Also last year we put our two 5th grade boys in public school for some personal reasons. They had a good year, but we brought them back home because we felt they would get a better education and one was highly influenced by his peers.
It was good to read your article that shared the positive aspects of the various forms of education.
My son is just barely 5, and we are homeschooling with the unschooling emphasis. It's hard to get people to understand that pushing him to learn something right now that he isn't ready to learn may just turn him off to learning anything! I want to give him real world skills and foster his love of God rather than make him sit down and do workbook pages.
Having been partially homeschooled (1-6th grades) and put through public schools, I can say one thing for sure – if I had been given the choice about what I would have learned, I never would have learned math. I HATED my times tables. With a passion. But had I not been forced to learn them (lots of repetition, flashcards, etc.) I never would have realized what I truly loved – I love math! I didn't major in math, but I loved the logic, the rules of it. Calculus was fun (I hated proofs, but other than that, I loved it) – even my college math course dealing with a logic and computer science focus was awesome. If my parents didn't make me learn my times tables I never would have discovered that love of mathematic logic in higher math. Now, having graduated with a degree in Computer Science with honors, it would not have happened without having the repetition so that I could do math in my head. It started with times tables, but by the end of college I could do derivatives in my head. And it's a good thing too – I couldn't dream of being a helicopter pilot without higher math. And without being forced when I thought it was too hard, I never would have accomplished what I have. So please – sometimes having your kids do stuff they don't want to do, and having them do that mindless repetition that you shun, is a good thing. Because they may never realize what they truly love without it.
Emma, I believe (and hopefully other hs parents do too) that there is a difference between "mindless" repetition and working hard to learn something. It can only be mindless if the topic has been mastered, otherwise the mind will be engaged in learning it.
I attended public school, never was homeschooled and what they were teaching was so dull and easy that I was often bored. That mindless repetition was a daily part of my life! Can't we move on to something new now?? I graduated high school in 3 years, having rarely taken homework home (it was completed before class was over) or studying for a test. My GPA was 3.92. However, I was TOTALLY unprepared for college! I had no idea how to study and the thought of reading 6 chapters for one class before the next day was absurd in my experience. I left the university after the first semester. Public school failed me in that regard. I choose not to subject my son to that, but that doesn't mean he just gets to do whatever he wants and not learn anything.
The flexibility of homeschooling allows the child to be trained up in the way he should go, as the Bible instructs. Some kids will just never get a certain subject, but will excel at others. If the one won't affect the future much, why bring the family to tears over it? Example: my younger sister had spina bifida. Numbers were meaningless to her. She could do the math, but it still just didn't mean anything to her. Should she have been forced to take higher math after conquering the basics? It wasn't something she'd need in her life. It'd be like being able to quote an essay written in a foreign language, but have no clue what you just said.
I agree though, an education wouldn't be complete without some struggles!
I absolutely love the idea of homeschooling, which I would mostly use unschooling. My husband on the other hand, worries about sports. Currently we live in a rural area (active duty military so can move at any time) and I am just beginning to look into homeschooling and all that it entails. I went to a very small school with 28 in my graduating class and my husband when to 7 different big high schools (parents moved A LOT). He always excelled in sports and would have gotten a free ride to college had he been at one school for more than a year. My question is, how would I incooroporate organized sports as a major part of homeschool and how would he be given an opportunity to be looked at by any colleges if he’s not playing for a high school??? If I can’t give my husband a good answer there is no way he will want our children homeschooled…
I think many local high schools will allow homeschooled children to try out for the teams now. But also I’d remind your husband that just because he is into sports does not mean his kids will be. He doesn’t want to be set up for disappointment in case they have other interests….