Each month, we have one book that is featured. This means it only costs you $5! Take advantage of this great deal to add to your collection and try some delicious new recipes!
This month’s book is Simply Summer.This summer, enjoy delicious, fresh recipes, like our favorite Mexican Pork Roast, Bacon-Wrapped Chicken with Italian Salsa (yum!), and Peach Upside Down Cake. Treat your family and friends!
One of my Grandmother’s favorite stories to tell happened around the time I was born. My parents were at the hospital with me and Grandmother and Grandad had come to stay with my older brother Greg, who was 2 ½ years old. The morning after I was born, Grandmother was making coffee and could not find any sugar for it. She turned to Greg and asked him, “Gregory, where does your mother keep the sugar?” Greg had never heard the word uttered in our household before, so he started looking in the first – to him, at least – logical place for it. He turned around and starting calling “Sugar? Sugar! Here kitty, kitty!” (We did not have a cat named Sugar.)
I grew up in what could easily be classified as a WAPF household. Our food came from the garden, the orchard, a local co-op and animals. I remember weekly trips to the local dairy to pick up our milk, summers picking cherries, apples, apricots and peaches in my great-aunt’s orchard, yogurt culturing on the counter and bread rising in the corner.
It didn’t take me very long to realize that I was growing up in a very different household than most of my peers. One of my earliest memories – I couldn’t have been more than three years old – was when my mother dropped me off at an afternoon daycare (sort of a “mother’s day out” program). She left me with a small snack, promising to return soon. The only thing I recall about that entire afternoon was when the teacher told us it was “snack time”. All the other kids gathered around her as she handed out handfuls of jelly beans. I stood in the back of the group, hesitating. Finally, after all the other kids had received their “snack” she turned to me.
“Do you want some jelly beans?” she asked me, smiling brightly.
“No thank you.” I choked out in reply. “I have carrot sticks.” I held up the baggie my mom had given me. What happened next was probably what so indelibly imprinted the memory on my mind. The teacher laughed. She called to her assistants, telling them “how cute” I was with my pathetic little bag of carrot sticks, turning down jelly beans. What seemed like hundreds of little eyes stared at me, all young like me, but old enough to know that no one turns down jelly beans for carrot sticks! For several minutes, the teacher tried to get me to accept the jelly beans, explaining that I could have both, and even that “all the other kids” had some.
“No thank you. I’m not allowed.” I stuck to my guns, ate my carrot sticks, and anxiously waited for my mom to return.
That was the first time I encountered a new environment – one where the rules were different. As I grew up, it became increasingly clear that my parents had very strict rules about foods: This is good, that is bad; eat this, not that; this is allowed, this isn’t.
I can’t remember a single time that either of my parents ever bothered to explain their reasons for avoiding sugar, packaged foods, processed foods, and restaurants. Because I didn’t understand their reasons – or even realize that there were reasons – I came to believe that their food rules were just a way to keep me from enjoying myself. All those things that had been labeled “off-limits” by my parents looked to me like the promised land.
Yes, I knew the WHAT when it came to eating well. What was missing was the WHY!
To make matters worse, as I began to get older, the rules seemed to relax. Cans of “cream of…” soup appeared in the pantry, making their way into casseroles. We stopped going to the dairy, and started buying milk at the grocery store. My mom started buying boxed cereals (as long as there were less than 10 grams of sugar per serving). The rules were changing, and not only did I have no explanation for the first set of rules, but now I had no explanation for the changes.
I was basically a disaster waiting to happen by the time I went off to college. My head knew the rules, but my heart was easily swayed by the campus food offerings – especially the dining hall. One swipe of my card and I was granted entrance to the land of white flour, white sugar, empty carbs and fake fats.
I met my husband at college. He’d grown up in the Midwest, in a fairly “normal” family eating the fairly normal Standard American Diet (SAD). When we got married, he ate three vegetables: Corn, green beans (from the can), and iceberg lettuce salads (with a little carrots, and maybe a bit of tomato on top). The first 10 years of our marriage, we lived on mostly packaged, processed SAD foods, and only when we weren’t out at a restaurant. The only meal I regularly “cooked” was oven- baked chicken drumsticks (from the grocery store), green bean casserole (complete with MSG-laden cream of mushroom soup and French fried onions mixed in AND on top), and Stove Top stuffing.
Image by kevin dooley
We’ve now been married 16 years. The past 6 years has been an ongoing journey to return to the diet of my childhood. It all started with the milk – I was talking with a friend from church and she happened to mention that they were getting raw milk from a local farmer. Just hearing the words “raw milk” made my mouth water. Of all the things we ate growing up, I missed the REAL milk the most. When she went on vacation and offered to let me use her cowshare while she was out of town, I jumped at the chance. Since that day, it’s been an amazing journey to get to the place we are now.
These days we eat very similarly to the way I ate when I was a kid. With one huge difference: I spend as much time and energy teaching my children why we eat this way as I do preparing the food we eat. I involve them in the decisions we make. I do not make things “off-limits”, but rather give them the information and the choice.
For instance, my children all attend AWANA, and over the course of the year they get several chances to visit the AWANA store and purchase things using the “shares” they’ve earned by wearing their uniform, bringing their Bible, knowing their verses, etc. Several of the items in the store are candy – Airheads, Twizzlers, giant Kit Kat bars, and other tempting treats. These are not things we have in our house, but they have the opportunity and the permission to purchase those items if they want them. They know what to look for on the labels (our big three are High Fructose Corn Syrup, Hydrogenated or partially-hydrogenated oils, and artificial colors). They know that they can choose to bring home an item even if it contains one of those big three ingredients, and that they’ll be allowed to eat the item. They also know that it will be rationed out to them using an “80/20” scale; 80% of the food they eat has to be healthy, nutritious whole food and the other 20% can be not-so-great. In the past 6 years, the amount of candy coming home from AWANA has dwindled to nothing. The last candy was “purchased” over a year ago by my youngest, and she took one bite of what she’d chosen and decided that it wasn’t worth eating. She threw the rest away and told me “next time, I’m going to get something that I can use, like a hula hoop!”
We also educate our kids about restaurants. We don’t have a large budget for eating out, but when we do, we go to a variety of restaurants. Luckily, we live in an area that has a few locally-owned (and one national chain) restaurants that use local and/or organic products and make use of the excellent farms we have nearby to source pastured meat and eggs. One of these restaurants even lets our kids eat free on the weekend!
Image by David Sifry
Sometimes we go to (gasp!) badrestaurants – Burger King, Pizza Hut, and some of those other awful places. I’ll be honest – the first couple of years into our WAP food journey, I looked forward to these visits. Now, I tend to opt out of eating when we do go. I just can’t stand the way I feel after eating there, so I choose to steer clear. The funny thing is, as we’ve given the children some leeway in making choices about where to eat, they have also stopped wanting to eat at those places. The rare request by one child usually gets vetoed by the other three, and the requester is usually reminded that “you never like anything you get there.”
I’m not guaranteeing that there’s a perfect formula for getting your kids to make wise choices when they grow older. For now I’m just doing what I can to help them understand why we’ve chosen to eat the way we do. Here are a few things I’m trying to do:
Be honest. While our eating habits today are much better than they were 6 years ago, they certainly aren’t perfect. I struggle with chronic pain issues, so I still rely on the easier meals, which includes some packaged food. I make sure to point out that these aren’t the best choice, and explain how badly I want to get well so I have the energy to make more things from scratch.
Share what you learn. If you’re just getting into this way of eating, take your kids along on the ride. Don’t just drag them, but involve them whole-heartedly. When I was educating myself as we started this journey the second time around, I was so excited I couldn’t keep what I was learning to myself. Our kids were the perfect audience. My enthusiasm was catching and they – like most kids – were eager for information of any kind. Though we don’t go to the grocery store any more, when we first began this journey our kids loved to shop with me, checking the ingredient lists on all their old favorite foods for “the bad stuff” and happily putting items back on the shelf when they discovered that those items weren’t really even food.
Allow choices. Taking a hard line, a “my way or the highway” stance on foods can push kids away, sometimes for good. Allowing kids to make some choices about what they eat, even when they make poor choices, can help them develop a good feedback loop, learn to listen to their own bodies, and feel some measure of control.
Offer alternatives. Our kids often get offered little “treats” like dum-dum suckers or miniature candy bars at church, at the bank, etc. However, they know that if they politely refuse these artificial-ingredient-laden things, there are better options waiting for them at home. Things that taste at least as good, if not better, than what they were offered. While Yummy Earth suckers and Equal Exchange chocolate still have sugar, they are at least sourced from organic ingredients and don’t contain anything artificial. I keep a supply of both on hand, and my kids always turn down the proffered “treats” knowing that they can come home and have the better-tasting, and better-for-them stuff.
I often wonder if some of my health problems, and definitely my weight problems, could have been avoided if my parents had been more open about the reasons for their food choices. I hope that in taking this path of teaching my own kids the what and the why will help them avoid some of the problems I’ve had.
What do you think? Is there a right way to teach children to follow in our healthy eating footsteps? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the matter!
I’m going to be very up-front with you all. Part Two was a LOT harder to write than Part One, and MUCH harder I expected. I originally intended to have part two done by the end of July and ready to go when Kate had her baby. That deadline came and went, so I tried to finish it in time for my September article for sure. Given that it’s nearly the end of October and this is finally showing up, you can clearly see that it wasn’t done in time for September.
So, why was this so difficult? Last week, as I gave up on my seventh draft and prepared to start all over again, I finally did what I should have done in the first place: I turned to God and spent several hours in prayerful soul-searching to determine what to share, and the best way to do so in a concise and loving way. I discovered two things were holding me back:
I knowI’m not an expert on this subject, and I don’t in any way want you to think that I’ve got all the answers, or that there’s an easy “do these steps for guaranteed success” solution
I couldn’t figure out what was okay to leave out. It all just seemed too important. On this, I made a compromise. Several items I have simply linked to, instead of quoting, but I strongly recommend you check out the links. Other than that, I felt that a lengthier article was better than one missing critical information. So, be forewarned that this is not going to be short. I really believe it’s worth reading, so don’t skip it just because it’s going to take some scrolling to finish.
Given those caveats, let’s all take a deep breath and dive in…
WHEN do we train our children?
Here’s the good news: when is the easy part. You don’t have to worry about having the “awkward talk” about the birds and the bees, there will be no need to hunt down your elusive teenager or find the right book to thrust in his hand as he passes you on the way to his room.
Picture by Pink Sherbet Photography
Training our children in Biblical Sexuality starts when they’re born and continues as they grow up; it’s an ongoing discussion. The Bible tells us to teach our children until God’s ways are “on their heart.” We’re supposed to discuss them “when we sit at home and when we walk along the road, when we lie down and when we get up” – essentially as a large part of our daily life. (Deuteronomy 6:6-8, 11:18-20) Just as we train them to obey authority, to respect boundaries and to make wise choices, we need to discuss God’s design for sex as often as any opportunities are presented. The hard part will be getting a word in edgewise between the opportunities, because they are everywhere!
Let’s face it: we live in a hyper-sexualized culture. You can’t make it through the day (even as a “sheltered homeschooler”) without encountering the world’s warped sexual message. It’s out there, everywhere. In the grocery store you see it in the way women are dressed, on the food labels, on the magazine racks, on the TV monitors (because who can go shopping these days without having a TV on every other aisle to keep up with the outside world?), and on the shopping cart itself sometimes! You drive down the street and see it on bumper stickers, billboards, even in the car driving next to you.
Then, of course, you have the TV shows themselves, movies, websites and ads on the internet – even on websites that are supposedly “educational” and geared toward young children – you get sexualized messages through today’s music, magazines and the free ads that show up in your mailbox.
From the day your child is born, you make choices about how to deal with this sex-themed onslaught. Every time you encounter S-E-X, how you choose to deal with it shapes your child’s view of sexuality.
Am I really suggesting that the choice you make about what to do with a raunchy fashion ad will somehow shape your child’s understanding of sex? Actually, yes…I am. So with that brazen accusation, let’s jump into the how of training teens in Biblical sexuality.
SET THE EXAMPLE
“You are my example to follow” by FoxSpain
Your kids look to you for guidance and direction. Our kids – especially our teens – are looking for someone to model their lives after, someone to imitate. If you want to pass on Biblical values to your kids, you have to model those same values in your own life. In the timeliest e-mail I ever received, there was actually an entire Q&A from Focus on the Family in my e-mail today. Check out what they have to say about parents’ influence on their kids’ views of sexuality.
IN YOUR ACTIONS: So what do you do with that raunchy fashion ad? Well, when Victoria’s Secret and Express “clothing” catalogs started showing up in our mailbox, I immediately placed them in the outdoor recycling can, to keep them out of sight and away from my boys’ eyes. But they kept showing up. It got to the point that I felt uncomfortable sending the kids out to retrieve the mail because I never knew when something lewd was going to be in the mailbox. So I got proactive. The very next time a catalog showed up, I got on the phone and called those catalogs’ respective customer service lines, asking to be taken off their mailing list completely. I let my kids hear my conversation, where I pointed out to the customer service rep that their catalog was basically “soft core” pornography, and had no place coming to my home where teenage boys are living.
My favorite, most comfortable bra happens to be a VS bra, which put me in a quandary. Was it appropriate to continue ordering from them if I didn’t want their catalog in my house? Actually, they solved the problem for me. One afternoon, I found what I wanted on their website and called to place my order. When I placed the order, I made it very clear that I DID NOT want to be put back on their mailing list and that I absolutely did not want any of their marketing materials to be included in my shipment. I warned her that if either of my requests were not honored, I would no longer do business with them. Not only were several catalogs included in the bag with my bras, but the mailbox onslaught returned, and it took not one, but three phone calls to get them to stop sending them. Now I buy my (slightly less comfortable) bras at JC Penney.
IN YOUR BEHAVIOR:What does modesty look like in your house? Do you or your spouse shower or use the restroom with the door open? Do think it’s cute when your kids run around naked or just in a diaper? Do you make or laugh at inappropriate jokes, watch inappropriate TV shows and movies, look at inappropriate pictures or even tell them to do one thing while clearly not doing it yourself? When you ask your kids to do as I say, not as I do, you’re really sending them the message that your behavior is somehow held to a different standard.
The truth is that every one of us should be held to a Biblical standard of purity, in our words, our actions and our thoughts. Our actions are the ones our kids are most likely to follow. That doesn’t just apply to our overtly sexual behavior. If we treat them with anger, they’re going to follow that example. If we treat them with disgust, neglect, teasing, belittling, frustration, etc, they will follow in our footsteps and treat others that way. More profoundly, kids who have a difficult home life are more likely to seek comfort in the form of a sexual relationship. Sexual immorality stems from a lack in self that one (wrongly) believes can only be met in sexual involvement.
Photo by Sean McGrath
IN YOUR OWN RELATIONSHIPS:Stay together! Study after study shows that kids whose parents are still married to each other are the least likely to be sexually active. If you are still married to the mother/father of your kids, staying married can be a critical step towards keeping your kids from sexual experimentation.
Keep Christ at the center of your relationship. Whether you’re still married to your kids’ parent, or currently in a step-family, or one-parent situation, it’s very important that your kids see an example of marriage the way God intended it. I have to admit, this is one area where I struggle quite often. My husband (and the father of our four kids) and I have been married for 16 years. Very few of those years have been “great” in terms of showing our kids a good example of marital bliss. Looking back, I can pinpoint that every single “bump” in the road of our marriage has been when one or both of us had turned away from Christ as the authority of our marriage and gone down our own selfish path.
It’s very difficult to encourage your kids to wait for the incredible blessing that sex within marriage is, if all they ever see is two people who are miserable to be together. Whether your problems are money, division of labor, selfish desires, sexual history, or something else, please actively pursue your relationship with Christ and get the help you need so that your relationship with your spouse can become a good example for your kids.
The “incentive” of waiting until marriage has to be real to them; they need to be able to relate to a real-world example of how good marriage can be. Strive to make your own marriage that example. In addition, seek out other couples and families that clearly demonstrate this with their lives and ask them to “mentor” your own family. If your kids are surrounded by examples of misery in marriage, they won’t feel any need to remain pure until marriage; they’ll simply feel that any marriage is doomed to a certain amount of misery, no matter what their sexual history is.
Photo by Chris Yarzab TEACH THEM TO THINK “WORLDVIEWISHLY”
First of all, no “worldviewishly” is not a real word. I’m borrowing the made-up word from a speaker I deeply respect – Dr. Jeff Myers (the new President of Summit Ministries) – who has a lot to say on teaching kids to think “worldviewishly.”
Let’s talk about movies for a moment. There’s a pretty big spectrum between movies like VeggieTales and movies no one should be watching. How do you decide which movies to allow your kids to watch and which to avoid? Well, a movie does not have to be “Christian” (made by, written by, themed, etc.) in order to be worth watching…or more accurately, to be useful for training your kids to understand different worldviews and how to defend a Christian worldview.
How do you use a worldly movie to train your kids in Biblical Sexuality? This is one resource that won’t wait until we get to the resources page. I STRONGLY recommend that you check out the Worldview courses put out by Summit Ministries. I don’t care if your kids are in Elementary, Middle or High school – there’s something available for all ages. I don’t care if you send your kids to public school, private school or homeschool them. Make time in your day to use these resources. Make a place in your budget for them. You will learn as much from them as your kids will. More importantly, they’ll teach your kids to take the messages they’re hearing and seeing from the rest of the world and learn how to filter them through God’s Word. It will strengthen their faith, and their resolve. These worldview courses – as well as the teen tracks put on by Summit at many homeschool conferences across the country – will help you and your children learn to discern the messages and counter-Christian worldviews that are being promoted in news, magazines, junk mail, TV shows and commercials, and movies.
In our house, we sit and watch movies (and select TV shows) together as a family. More mature-themed movies are occasionally watched with our two older boys (ages 12 and 14) after the little girls (8 and 6) have gone to bed. The pause button gets a lot of use, because we stop frequently and ask the kids to think about what the show they are watching is trying to persuade them to think. As we continue in our worldview studies, I am surprised and amazed at some of the answers my kids are able to come up with – they seem to be finding messages that I sometimes miss!
The point is to observe (rather than “ingest”) media together as a family, and use what you’ve learned to help them find the messages they’re trying to be persuaded to believe. This is part of that ongoing discussion that starts when they’re young. Ask questions like “What is this story trying to make you believe or think? Do you believe it? Why, or why not?” As they get good at the basics, dig deeper and get more specific: “Which character made you feel sympathy? What other emotions did you feel? Why? What does the Bible say about what happened?”
Along these same lines, the AWANA program is an excellent tool for Biblical training. There is nothing like hearing your 12-year-old refute a suggestion he sees in a movie by explaining how it doesn’t hold up logically, then backing up his logic using memorized scripture!
Definitely use sites like PluggedIn to help you make discerning choices about movies, TV shows, music and video games before you allow them in your house. Keep computers and other internet-connected devices in plain sight. Last year for his birthday, we gave our oldest son an iPod touch. Even though I have complete faith that he won’t go looking for indecent content on his own, we still require that his iPod be kept in the family part of the house at all times, where we can see what he is doing. I also have the ability to log into his Facebook and e-mail accounts to keep tabs on what he’s doing – being able to do so was a requirement for allowing him to get them. I want him to learn to use computers and social media, but I want him to do so wisely. As he gets older, I will gradually loosen the reigns, depending on the openness of his relationship with us, and his demonstrated responsibility in those areas.
EDUCATE YOURSELF SO YOU CAN EDUCATE THEM
If you don’t understand the full reasons for saving all sexual activity for marriage, it will be impossible to help your kids understand it. If you’ve made it this far, but you’re just saying “What’s the big deal?” then you have some preparation to do on your own before you try to prepare your kids.
As I mentioned in Part One, sexual purity is not just about saving the act of sexual intercourse for marriage and everything else is up for grabs (no pun intended). It’s very important that we teach our kids that while sexuality is a normal, God-given condition, it is something very special that needs to be reserved for the person they end up marrying. That means all sexual behavior.
This is where the question usually gets asked: “How far is too far?” I know I asked the question as a teen, and I sat through many an uncomfortable youth group discussion dealing with it. The only answer I ever got was “Well, that’s a hard question. It’s a gray area. Physical boundaries are different for everyone. What’s right for you may not be right for someone else. Only go to the point that you feel comfortable, then stop before you get out of control.” Anyone who knows anything about teenagers should feel embarrassed to even consider giving that kind of advice. Sex feels good.By the time you get to the point that you feel comfortable, it’s often way too late to stop!
So, how do you deal with the question in a Biblical way? For starters, the Bible asks us to treat others as “brothers…and sisters, in all purity.” (1 Timothy 5:1-2) As much as I hear “every family’s guidelines are different” or “you need to make your own decisions on where to draw the line,” that’s not the Biblical command we are given. God clearly tells us that “Among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality…” (Ephesians 5:3)
Purity isn’t a line you draw, it’s a direction you go! When the Bible says flee from evil (2 Timothy 2:22), God isn’t suggesting that there’s a line you can draw to indicate how close you can get to evil. He’s saying “Go in the other direction, as fast as you can!”
The Bible tells us that “He who sins, sins. He who sins sexually sins against yourself, against your own body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18) Now, I realize the Message is a paraphrase, but this is an awesome version that really clarifies the thoughts:
There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, “The two become one.” Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never “become one.” There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others. In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own bodies, these bodies that were made for God-given and God-modeled love, for “becoming one” with another. Or didn’t you realize that your body is a sacred place, the place of the Holy Spirit? Don’t you see that you can’t live however you please, squandering what God paid such a high price for? The physical part of you is not some piece of property belonging to the spiritual part of you. God owns the whole works. So let people see God in and through your body. (1 Corinthians 6:16-20, The Message)
There’s more to teaching sexual purity than just explaining what it is. It is just as critical for our kids to have an honest, open and wholehearted relationship with Christ. Without that relationship, sexual purity has no meaning. When sexual purity is lost, it’s because that relationship has been damaged, lost or set aside. You cannot have one without the other.
When it comes to teaching your kids about sexual purity, it is critical that you have an honest, open and wholehearted relationship with Christ, AND with your kids. As Josh McDowell often says, Rules without Relationship lead to Rebellion.
To finish off, I’d like to just add a few ideas of what teaching sexual purity looks like to me.
Photo by ^@^ina/angel_ina
I tell my kids that sexual purity means loving and being faithful to your future spouse before marriage (probably before you even meet them). Loving and being faithful to your future spouse before marriage radically increases the ability to love and stay faithful in marriage.
I try to live, and teach my kids to live with an attitude of respect. I tell my kids – ‘Ask yourself: “Am I dishonoring anyone in the way I am acting or thinking right now?” That includes the other person in the relationship, your future husband or wife, your parents or future in-laws, and, of course, Christ.’
I recommend avoiding the dating format entirely. Dating before you are ready to be married simply leads to sexual frustration, opportunities to make mistakes, and broken hearts. When you feel ready for marriage, pray for guidance and ask your parents to help you as you wait for God to bring your future spouse into your life.
“Group dating” in high school and college is a great way to avoid traditional dating. Rather than going off alone as a couple, spend time with a larger group of male and female friends with the intention of pursuing fun in a Godly manner
When it seems that God is pointing you toward a particular person, consider following the courting method, rather than dating. (see the resources link for more on courting)
Keep the sexual purity discourse going in your household. I love to use word pictures (Jesus told parables for good reason) with my kids. A recent example: “What if we equated “don’t have sex” with the rule “don’t drive on the freeway”? Well, every time you do something that is sexual but isn’t technically sex, you are like the driver who tells himself and his parents “I promise not to drive on the freeway.” Then he gets in his car, and heads toward the freeway. He gets on the on-ramp, and accelerates towards the freeway, but instead of merging with the freeway traffic, he instead drives on the shoulder. Sometimes, he crosses the rumble strip and allows his tires to ride the line, but never actually drives “on” the freeway. The first few times, he only stays on until the next exit, but after a while he’s driving this way for miles. And as much as he tells his parents, his friends, and even himself that he didn’t really drive on the freeway, in his heart of hearts, he knows that for all intents and purposes has broken the rule. What’s worse, when he finally is allowed to drive on the freeway, most of the pleasure he should get from being given that freedom is missing because his “almost driving on the freeway” has essentially taken away all the distinction and exclusivity out of the experience.
I’ve challenged my kids to save their first kiss for their wedding day. I’m guessing most people – even the conservative ones – reading this, think that’s silly, or an outrageously unreasonable expectation. Here’s what I’ve found, in my four months of heavy research on this topic. I met, talked to, and IM-chatted with a lot of people. Of all those people who didn’t save their first kiss for their wedding day, quite a few said they wished they had (many of them also wished they’d saved many other things). Of all those people who did save their first kiss, not a single one says they regretted it.
Do I think it’s doable? Sure – if if their father and I are there to support them, encourage them, and help guide them, if their commitment is taken seriously and the focus is on their commitment to and relationship with Christ, rather than a commitment to avoiding a specific act.
Did you make it this far? If so, THANKS! I appreciate it! I’d love it if you’d share in the comments your own thoughts and ideas on the subject.
PS – I’m putting together a whole list of resources and linkson this subject for you guys, but it is taking much longer than I expected. So check it out now, but be sure to come back later when it’s all finished!
How do you handle Biblical sexuality training/upbringing in your home?